Oh S**T!

Well, I have discovered over the past few days that I will not be in the delivery room when my daughters give birth.  I have spent the last 3 days coaching Charlie as he gave birth to a poop, and I really do not want to experience any of my children being in that kind of pain again -- even if the prize is a grandchild!

Poor Charlie has been constipated for almost a week now -- we have emphatically blamed too much Easter candy!  We have been pumping him full of all the usual "pipe cleaners":

with no success ...  It is hard to reason with a 5 year old as he sits crying on the potty while asking for food because he is hungry!  When I got to the point that I was saying, "No, you can not have any more food until you let your poop out", I realized it was time to get serious.

Seriously, how pathetic is this?

I think I can, I think I can, I think I can ...

Today, we got serious -- yep, you really can't qualify for  parent-of-the-year status until you have inserted an inch long suppository into your child's butt!  Usually Joy and I argue over who has to take the kids to baseball practice, or who is cleaning up the dinner dishes ... let's just say I should have gone with rock not paper in today's battle!!

Even after the suppository, we still had to cajole Charlie into trying again.  I really don't know how he held it in as long as he did, clearly, we were up against a Professional Poop Holder -- that kid has some serious sphincter strength! 

I logged over 5 hours sitting on the floor with Charlie's feet on my shoulders, chanting, "You can do it Charlie ... OK, deep breath, now Puuuuush ... 1 ... 2 ... 3 ... 4 ... ".  I doubt that the excitement of seeing a piece of poop "crowning" is as thrilling as seeing a baby's head push its way out.  I do understand that I am not going to love that little piece of poop forever and celebrate its milestones as the years go by, but by God, I sure did feel a sense of pride when it finally arrived!

The poop prize!!  Yeah, more candy -- clearly we haven't learned our lesson!

...it's been you woman, Right down the line

Sue and I met two decades ago and began our journey together three years later. After seeing this new video by Bonnie Raitt (cover of Gerry Rafferty's song), I decided it was time to hack into Sue's blog account and take a moment to say this to Sue Ellen:

"You know I need your love
You've got that hold over me
Long as I've got your love
You know that I'll never leave
When I wanted you to share my life
I had no doubt in my mind
And it's been you woman
Right down the line"

Happiness is ...

... 6 smelly boys, five pounds of sugar, lots of snacks and a new basketball hoop (as defined by my smelly boy)!  Last night Ethan had a sleepover to celebrate his upcoming 10th birthday.  He only invited his quiet, well-mannered friends!!!

After playing basketball for the first time this past winter, Ethan discovered that he really enjoyed it, so we got him a basketball hoop for his birthday.  Joy and I were literally still putting it together when the first guest arrived, but the boys enjoyed breaking it in.

Perhaps they enjoyed breaking it in a little too much, because we have since moved the hoop to a different spot in our yard due to our neighbor's car being hit one too many times -- ooops!

After some basketball, the boys came inside so Ethan could open some presents (thanks for the new wii games, Mommy & Mama!),

do a little gambling,

and goof around a little,

before it was off to the back yard for some kickball/dodgeball.

When it was too dark to play ball, the boys came inside for some cake & ice cream.

Hannah and Olivia were both out of the house spending time with their own friends, but Charlie was still at home trying sooo hard to play with the big boys.  Ethan and his friends were very kind to Charlie, but all too soon he had to go to bed -- he was not one bit happy about it.  Sometimes it is so hard to be the little brother!

After a (really too noisy for my elderly neighbors) game of manhunt, the boys came inside and retreated to the family room for some quality wii time and to watch some movies before they actually fell asleep -- thankfully all the running around must have tired them out more than the cake and candy wound them up!

I was sure to sugar the boys up before their parents came to pick them up in case they did not get enough the night before!

According to Ethan it was, "the best sleepover ever", so I guess I have done my job.  Happy (almost) 10th birthday Ethan Zachary!!

sleepover carnage!

A Star is Born

This weekend was Hannah's premiere stage performance in her middle school's musical, Seussical.  She played a Who, and we had great fun experimenting with "Who hair and make up":

Exhibit A

Exhibit B

Exhibit C

The show opened to packed crowds on Friday night, after an exhausting week of late night dress rehearsals.  Although flash photography was discouraged, I did sneak a few shots of my favorite Who.

The opening night performance was fantastic, bringing the crowd to their feet during the finale.

The next night's performance was equally entertaining.  The kids did an exceptional job with the choreography, acting and singing.  Their hard work was very evident  -- they all have so much to be proud of.

Hannah is already anticipating her starring role in next year's musical, now that she has one show under her belt!  

some of Hannah's adoring fans

A Who and her Horton

The closing night performance ended with a dance party for the cast & crew -- the kids Cha Cha slid, and Cotton Eye Joe'd, danced to Lady GaGa and Adele and ended their night, arms intertwined singing their hearts out to Journey's "Don't Stop Believing" ... oh to be 12 again!

flowers from her adoring public

Bravo cast and crew, Bravo!!

A "Capitol" Idea

I had the pleasure of chaperoning my son Ethan's 4th grade field trip to the State Museum and Capitol Building today.  It was really a great day, the kids were awesome and the museum and capitol were equally awesome.  We began our day at the museum where the kids had a scavenger hunt that they had to complete.

A really big William Penn

We raced up and down three levels to find all the items on the scavenger hunt (um, sorry Mrs. Hoffman  ... I mean we walked very quietly through the museum to complete our hunt!)

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh

feeling the center of the earth 

how many horses were used to pull this wagon???

Wait, what was the name of that guy???

When was the charter signed???

Then we had some time for the gift shop

 and, of course, lunch

 before we went to the capitol building for our tour.

 We met with State Representative, Sheryl Delozier

who showed us her very cool "office", the House of Representatives,

 took a class photo,

 walked through the ornately decorated building,

 sat in the Senate,

 and in the courtroom for the Supreme Court of PA.

 We had a chance to tour the outside of the capitol as well ...

ooooh, my eyes, there are naked people in that sculpture ... 

best group of 4th graders ever!

Future representative -- he's got my vote!

Best 4th grade teacher ever!!!